#TBT: The one where I died.

The night after my surgery I stayed in the hospital. I had pain meds through an IV drip, and more pain pills given to me every couple hours. I was living a prescription med junkies dream. While these additional pills were given to me, they would check all my vitals, and let me shuffle to use the restroom. They were having me pee in a measuring cup pan thing to keep track of my fluid outtake, they would then write it on a board. They were monitoring me to make sure everything was okay. About the 3rd shuffle I stopped caring about holding the back of my gown shut, I am a great at multitasking, but trying to hold a gown, not trip on the things they had on my legs to keep the muscles or nerves stimulated, trying to roll my IV over the transition strip in the doorway, and not lifting my arms up to far, this was to much for me to deal. I figured they can look at my pancake butt and tramp stamp, I decided they had to have seen worse, at least my butt didn't look like a California raisin. This routine started around 8pm and lasted until I was discharged at 11am. (Please note: when my family came back to the room in the morning, I began closing the back of my gown again.) Sometime around 2am on Wednesday, they nurse asked me if I was hungry and I told her yes, I hadn't eaten since 10pm on Monday. I was starving!! I asked for broth since I had nausea and had problems keeping water down. The nurse said she would be right back, I think she forgot because I never got that broth. About an hour later I had fallen asleep and was resting peaceful when I started to hear some screaming. It was the lady in the next room. I thought she was yelling "I am in pain," Jesse said she was yelling, "You hurt me, stay away from me!" I am going to vote that Jesse was right on it because of the large amount of meds in my system. He even "casually strolled" down the hallway AKA was on a recon mission to see what was going on. He said she was in the room complaining about everything. Another vital check passed, and then back to bed. I was resting peacefully when I was abruptly woken up by the machine next to me beeping. My heart leaped out of my chest, I looked over and the machines I was hooked up to was beeping. I hollered at Jesse to wake up, asked him what was going on. I asked "Am I dying?" He said it was the machine and quickly left to get the nurse. Those 5 seconds were some of the longest seconds of my life...My life flashed before my eyes, the machine just kept beeping. I mean, I have seen every episode of Grey's Anatomy. I am 82% positive if I needed to I could fill in during a surgery, diagnose most medical ailments, and this beeping machine? I know what it means, it HAD to mean my heart stopped. I readjusted myself in the bed, turned the channel to something better then a "sham wow infomercial," realized I had to pee again when Jesse came back in the room and told me the nurse was coming. I started to think that maybe I should have written down a will instead of notifying my family via phone. The nurse came in and turned off the machine, "Its just your IV bag, it ran out, I'll get you a new one." What!?! I'm not dead ?!?!, I thought to myself. Well that's a relief. Then my second thought was I felt like this should have been caught before now, or warned it may happen. And my third, I still had not gotten my broth.